The Only Reason to Be a Journalist Is the Prospect of Writing Paragraphs Like These

"Some of the money was spent in contacting the Russia mafia as we tried to clone mammoths," Hwang told the court during a hearing this week.

"But you can't say that [on the expense claim] so we expensed it as money for cows for experiment."

Headline: Korean scientist paid mafia for mammoth (via Warren Ellis). Yup: that South Korean guy who said he cloned a human embryo but didn't apparently also attempted at some point to create what I can only assume was an army of mindless mammoth warriors ready to do his bidding. But I guess the Russian mafia has cornered that market (???).

Also:

"Do you know how hard it is to secure four or five animal ovaries at butcher shops? You need to keep the workers there happy," he says.

Eww — sexy.